A Year of Choice
Wednesday, 9 February 2011
Lately I’ve been feeling like my little corner of the interwebs has been getting pretty heavy. Too serious. I love that I can come to this space and let it all hang out, so to speak. To get my thoughts out of my head and speak my peace. But my original intention here was to have a place to reflect on the joy in my life.
Life gets heavy. Some days I can bear the weight and others I feel as though it may crush me. Having just begun the journey of homeschooling in earnest (even though The Boy has been home with me more years than he was in school) has been a pretty heavy burden. Raising children itself is a heavy task. (I won’t say burden.) Lately the seriousness of it has been weighing on my heart. Am I doing the right thing? Am I doing a good enough job? Why me?
It’s been a very rough time the past two weeks so I had to step away from this place because there simply wasn’t any room for it. In the midst of it, I told The Boy that he had a choice. A choice to be angry at the world and at me, or to be happy and joyful. That it was within his power to make his days easy or hard.
I’d like to say that snapped him right out of it, but that’s not entirely true. However, I would say it made a bit of a difference. That and a course of antibiotics for yet another ear infection that has been festering for too long.
So what did I find in my mailbox that very night? A post from Erin over at Bluebirdbaby, and her project for A Year of Choice. In her words:
“Then I’m reminded every single day I come on here, that I can choose. And that’s what I do. I consistently choose, because that’s our gift. And I don’t want to waste such a wonderful gift as that. Would you?!
So this isn’t a 30 day challenge, but rather a challenge for the year. It doesn’t have to be daily or weekly. I want it to be genuine and totally in the moment. Post about your choices and how they have affected your life. Post about joy or happiness. Post about awesomeness in the midst of hardship. Or just post about awesomeness because it’s there. Post about a cup of coffee that saved a hard morning or the glass of wine that saved a hard day. Or the knitting that brings you back to your joy several times throughout the day.
And all of this is tied into joy, beauty, happiness, and mindfulness. There are so many ways to go about it. And at the root of it all is choice.”
I’ve always admired Erin for her joyful optimism and her ability to see beauty in the ordinary. And I’ve already made it clear that my word for the year is mindfulness. How could I not join in?
There have been a few moments that I have managed to attain that state of mindfulness I am so desperately seeking. Last week, I found it while kneading the dough for our family pizza night. But sadly, the moments are elusive for me. I still have work to do. Good thing I have another ten and a half months!
So for the first time, I pose a question to you who are reading this right now: how do you find joy in everyday life?
No. 1 — February 9th, 2011 at 3:45 pm
Hello Rose
There must be something in the air! I feel like I have lost any joy in childrearing that I had and I am terribly lost. I guess all I can do is sit and think my way through this. I have a toddler who is challenging me all the time and I don’t know how to deal with it. Thanks for posting the question – I don’t have any answers but I will do some thinking.
Best Wishes.
No. 2 — February 9th, 2011 at 4:08 pm
it may be familiar, but i find solace in writing down the beautiful things i see/feel/feel thankful for… no puke all night long, lions manes, cardinals in the snow, a clean sink…
it doesn’t always work to keep me joyful, but it keeps me looking…
No. 3 — February 15th, 2011 at 6:25 pm
I really think you should keep in mind that these things go in cycles (heaviness, gladness), and that while we try so hard to make positive choices that are right for us, sometimes there are outside factors that barge in and smack the heck out of our good intentions. There’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that things (the kids, whatever) are hard. That is as valid as finding joy.
That ball of dough really is a fine sight. Those words you said to your child? Also beautiful in their solid truth. It is a concept all our children do need to learn, and better sooner than later (for us as well as them!).
In my space my everyday beauty is most readily found in nature–the quality of the light–or in a recipe that sings, or a good belly-laugh or ten with a friend (happened to have that last one today).
I’m not always happy with my situation in life, but I find great peace in the fact that with each passing year I fit better in my skin, so to speak.
Also bringers of joy: the faces of my growing babies, just before they go to sleep or as they are sleeping. Those eyelashes, the little pout of slumber.
When all else fails, breathe in your belly. This too shall pass. And you are not alone.